Crazy-ass family

You just can't make this stuff up

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

I Likes Me Some Singing

So I don't talk much about my singing lessons because really, how boring is that? But I have to tell you that I'm just having so much fun. And you know what else is cool? I mean, besides getting to sing without people telling me to stop singing for 45 minutes? All the compliments! I dig the compliments.
But the compliments have led to trouble. See, when people compliment me, I start to melt and thusly become all pliable and twisty. In this fashion, a person can quite successfully make me their bitch. My singing teacher uses this technique with frightening skill and relentless regularity.
This is why I have agreed to sing in a massive competition in the spring.
It's funny because it's surreal and I'm sort of convinced it's not really going to happen!
It's funny!
Because my bowels start to contort with the very thought of the possibility that it could be real!
It's funny!
Dudes, it's some scary shit.
I mean, what was I thinking? I'll tell you what I was thinking! I was thinking, "I can do that! I'm awesome!
Do you know why?
The compliments.
Caroline was all, "I was thinking about you the other day. You are amazing. You are one of those rare few with natural talent, you know? I mean, you could do this professionally!"
Commence melting-induced pliability.
When I'm there and singing, I feel okay. I mean, if she happens to look at me while I'm singing, I get antsy because WHAT ARE YOU DOING? TRYING TO MAKE ME EVEN MORE SELF CONSIOUS, WOMEN? WHAT?
Come on. You don't need to look at me when I sing! Listen! Yeah! I'm SINGING, not contorting myself into a pretzel!
Or stripping!
In any case, it appears this weak alter-ego of mine has agreed to compete and has even, in fact, paid the application fee.
So I shall compete. I will sing, "Angel From Montgomery" (the John Prine and Bonnie Raitt version) and "Good Enough" (Evanescence). Why have I chosen these songs? Because of my soul, people. And how these songs sort of wrap around it and tug, hard.
From "Angel From Montgomery":

If dreams were thunder
And lightening was desire
This old house would have burned down
A long time ago


How the hell can a person
Go to work in the mornin'
And come home in the evenin'
And have nothing to say?

Soul-tugging stuff.
From the Evanescence tune:

Under your spell again
I can't say no to you*
Crave my heart and it's bleeding in your hand
I can't say no to you

I shouldn't have let you torture me so sweetly
Now I can't let go of this dream I can't breathe but I feel
Good enough
I feel good enough
For you...

Anyhoo. I'm not going to tell you the name of the festival, because I'm sort of hoping nobody'll come. Maybe they'll do a really crappy marketing job this year! Maybe all the organizers will get Ebola (oh I instantly feel bad writing that. Forgive me, sweet baby Jesus! I so totally do not wish horrible illness on anyone! Maybe just a mild form of festival-related marketing amnesia?)

In any case, if you happen to be there? Avert your eyes when it's my turn! Yeah! Focus on the pretty trees or perhaps that cute guy in front of you! Much nicer.

Ah, I love singing. But maybe I should have just limited it to the car...

*Hey! I think I know why this song feels so right to me!


At 8:44 AM, Anonymous bee said...

YAy Tree!!!! Good for you! Keep up the good work. You know, you could tell me the festival's name. You'd never even know I was there!

At 10:28 AM, Blogger deepoet said...

You make me laugh, love the compliments stuff. When I was in grade 5 I got in front of the class no less than 3 times and sang, Jacob's Ladder twice and another I can't even remember. Man, at 10 yrs old I was absolutely nerveless. Wouldn't catch me near a stage now, acourse.
You'll do fine, sweetie.

At 6:39 PM, Blogger Laura_Rob said...

Im going to be there... I'll find out what it is... mwa ha ha

I'll use my bribery tactics!!

YAY!!!! (ok fine I'll look at the hot guy in the front row and then every now and then take a peak at you too!)


At 7:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you go girl.

just do everything your teacher tells you to do (trust me on this!)

At 7:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, my god, you can make anything funny...and melodramatic.

You are awesome!! At almost everything! So go get 'em!


P.S. I can find out the festival. I have my ways...

At 8:29 PM, Blogger Tree said...

Um, Jill? Almost? I mean? Almost? I mean, thanks for the compliment!

At 8:11 AM, Blogger The Mater said...

Tree, why aren't you singing "I Don't Stand a Ghost of a Chance Without You"?!

If you freeze
Get weak knees
And the voice starts to go shaky ...

Take your flute
Give a toot
That'll keep everyone awaky

You go, girl :>)


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