Crazy-ass family

You just can't make this stuff up

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

The Moral Is: Only Kiss People You WANT To Kiss

My life is crazy. It’s a precarious balancing act, and my sanity wavers with the ebb and flow of change and of constancy. I’m not worried; I’m just acknowledging it.

You know how there are times in your life…times of flux? When that nice, safe grasp you had on everything around you becomes sort of slippery? And suddenly what you thought was down is up? It’s one of those times, friends, and I’m floating…waiting to see where I’ll land.

I’m not complaining. I like change. It feels good to know that things aren’t stagnant, you know? It’s exciting…makes me anticipate getting up in the morning. But I also tend to bend under strain a bit. It could go either way, really. Let’s look at an example:

I was thirteen years old when I started seeing a charming fellow who insisted everyone call him Burnt. Yeah, that’s what he CHOSE for a name. Insert eye roll here. See, I didn’t really care for Burnt coughhisrealnamewasChriscoughcough, but my friend thought he was rad, so whatever. Hey, I was thirteen, okay?

That, of course, was the age when kissing became very exciting. You had to do it! You must kiss your boyfriend a LOT. Which was okay, except for the whole not being very interested in my boyfriend thing. I tried to be interested. I did! But…well…dude wasn’t the sharpest guy around (I’m thinking you probably picked that up with the whole “Burnt” thing), and therefore NOT a stimulating conversationalist. I needs me a boy with brains. In any case…let me sum up:

-Didn’t care for Burnt
-Decided to go out with Burnt because my friend thought he was rad (dudes, I have so totally matured since then…please know this!)
-Kissing was mandatory
-I did not want to kiss Burnt
-I did kiss Burnt

So, yeah...I kissed him. And I was so, so stressed about it that something interesting occurred. Burnt had bronchitis. I caught it. Then, it morphed.

The bronchitis.

It morphed into mono. The kissing disease. It freaked the doctors out. That doesn’t happen! You don’t develop mono…you catch it from someone else who has it. Not me! I believe that I was so stressed and angsty over the whole Burnt/kissing situation that I got the most appropriate disease to express what I was going through.


Funny how the mind works, isn’t it? And interesting how our physiology reacts.

So I’m in a time of flux, dear friends, and it’s rather exciting…who knows what’ll happen! Like I said, I’m not worried. After all, I still have some old Zoloft in the cupboard…that's still good after a year or so, right?

But if I spontaneously combust, you’ll know it’s just my body reacting appropriately to the state of my mind.

And just to balance things out, I’ll tell you that I’ve also done amazing things in times of flux! But those are stories for other days…


At 2:00 PM, Blogger Ann said...

ARRGGHH.. for some reason when I try to leave a comment every few seconds I refresh and it wipes out what I am saying.. so I have to type fast.

Ok. so I too have kissed those that I had left kissless but honest I don't remember getting sick from it.. wow. That is one powerful brain you have there!!!


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