Crazy-ass family

You just can't make this stuff up

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Ghost Story Tuesday

This week I'm going to interrupt the story of the woman in my room, but do not dispair; she'll be back next week.

~~~

Some people say I'm amazing. Lots say I'm crazy. Most say I have a gift.

I say I have a talent. I was born with a talent which I've been fortunate enough to be able to develop and nurture. Just like some are born with the ability to sing, or write, or understand quantum physics, I was born with the ability to sense and work with energy. It only makes me as special as the next person; the one who touches our hearts with poetry, or makes our souls soar with a song.

I am deeply disturbed when people start to think of me as something that I'm not: something superhuman, or something more than the next person. It goes without saying that expectations can become a little unrealistic when one is seen as being able to answer any question. And dissapointment is quick to follow.

Sometimes, I know things. I see things, and I help people. I converse with the dead on a regular basis, and I know people intimately because I can look at them in a way that does not lie. But I don't know everything! And sometimes I just want to turn it all off so I can just have some peace and quiet. One of my most common phrases is "I don't want to be psychic anymore!"

How ungrateful.

But then there are those times...

I have witnessed grown men crying like babies because of what I'm telling them. I have been hugged long and hard by people who never show emotion or who are known to be standoffish. I have helped people find things. I have healed. I have given advice that has changed people's lives. And I've given hope.

When I met Jim, he didn't believe in anything...he was certain there was no higher power, no afterlife...and now, because of the work that he's witnessed me do, he believes there is something else.

That is a gift.

People let me in. They open up and allow me to look at them. They give me so much:

Trust.

Gratitude.

Friendship.

Love.

They let me into thier hearts and into thier homes and they share things with me that they've never shared with anyone.

These are all gifts, too.

Sometimes, someone I do a reading for is changed in such a way that they feel like they have to share their experience with others. They call friends, they email, they write about it...and they make people think about something a little different. That is a wonderful gift to me. If you haven't been reading about Jenn's ghosts, you should. And if have, keep on reading...she hasn't told the best of it yet.

In 13 days, I go back to work with the government. I will sit at a desk in front of a computer and I will do a good job because that's what I always do. But here is my vow: after I repay my year of maternity leave, I will find a way to do my real life's work and it won't just be good...it'll be wonderful! I've never felt comfortable charging for readings, so I think that, in a year, when I start this work that I am meant to do, I will let my clients decide what and how they'd like to pay me. When I thought of that this morning, it felt right.

This thing I've been born with is sometimes a burden, and sometimes it's an overwhelming joy, but it's always a responsibility I take seriously. I always have this question in the back of my mind when I read for people: "How is this going to affect this person? Will it be good for them?" Sometimes I don't tell them things because it would be better for them to find out on thier own, and sometimes I tell them something to help them make different decisions and change what I see.

My main goal is to help, even if I look bad in the end. Would you believe that I take comfort in the fact that people can choose not to believe what I tell them? Because I know that if a message from a loved one is just too much...or they aren't ready...they can just brush me off as a fraud, and be ok. But I can hope that they'll remember my words when they're ready to.

This is a confusing work. And there's no real manual to go by or test to measure with. I question myself all the time. There's so much I don't know! But there are a few things I do know: I need to do this. I do it well. And I need to teach it.

And in a life that is wracked with anxiety and often disturbed by fear, these gifts that I recieve when I use my talent are priceless. I need those, too.

So, to all of you out there who have let me in and shared bits of your lives and of your selves with me, thank you. You always say I have given you so much...but your gifts to me are just as precious!

17 Comments:

At 10:50 AM, Blogger LoriLaurieLauri said...

Aw, Tree...I don't know what to say really...but, we love you! And you are such a special person, with or without your gift!

 
At 10:52 AM, Blogger Jennboree said...

You do have a talent and I'm glad you recognize it as such. It may feel like a burden at times but do you realize how many people are so confused and "lost" when it comes to spirituality and life beyond this one?

Since coming to your site and getting to know you through your words, I have a greater acceptance and understanding of that world which we cannot see. Thank you for sharing.

 
At 11:29 AM, Anonymous Jenn said...

You've made it impossible for me to see the universe in the same old way, and I am so grateful! Mwah mwah mwah.

 
At 1:55 PM, Blogger Diana said...

awwww *hug* I wove you.

 
At 8:16 PM, Blogger The Mater said...

Dear Tree, this was so heartfelt and eloquent and it helps me to know a bit more about you, in addition to your amazing "talent".

I will respond to your emails shortly but have been at Jenn's for several days and a bit tuckered out from the long drive home.

I was always enamored of Madeleine L'Engle's Wrinkle in Time series when the kids were little. What you do (and do so well) reminds me of "kything". It's been years since I've read L'Engle but I seem to recall that she used this term to describe a spiritual connection between two souls that transcends ordinary time or other dimensions of "reality".

Please share more of how you have been gifted ... does it run in the family? An awesome talent, my dear.

You have certainly touched my life and Jenn's. And for that we are richer. Blessings!

 
At 8:26 AM, Anonymous bee said...

Hi Tree! I think I have a ghost. I also think I have presences in the attic. Maybe one day you will visit and see for sure, or not. I've really enjoyed your writing. Thanks for sharing!

 
At 8:45 AM, Blogger s@bd said...

i think you're wonderful.

AND I DON'T BELIEVE IN GHOSTS!!

(so far)

 
At 11:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Such a beautiful entry, Treesey babe... special girl.
Dad.

 
At 2:02 PM, Anonymous marian said...

Found you through breed em and weep. Very nice post. I'll be back!

 
At 2:38 PM, Blogger Eve said...

Although I'm a big scaredy cat when it comes to ghostly stuff, and sometimes I can't let myself think about the things you write,
just being able to get to know you through your blog is an amazing gift to me.
You are an amazing person. :)

 
At 2:44 PM, Blogger Jennboree said...

So Tree...what do you do about those who don't believe in ghosts? Does it frustrate you because no matter how you try to explain, sometimes others just don't "see"?

I think you are honest in what you say but I have to admit because I haven't SEEN a ghost for myself, it is hard to swallow. Maybe cuz of all the bad publicity psychics get? I dunno. So keep talkin!

 
At 6:14 PM, Blogger Deb said...

I am so glad to hear that you only have to work away from your babies for a year! How exciting!

I think your idea of asking how much someone should pay you is perfect, esp b/c you already felt it was perfect!

The gratitude comes through as well as the responsibility you feel. I believe we all have the ability, but just aren't tuned into it. How do you think you have been able to tune yourself in and out when you need to?
Thanks for all you share. It is an honor.

 
At 6:27 PM, Blogger Tree said...

jennboree, people ask me that a lot. You know what? I don't get frustrated anymore. I have such a peace about it now...if people believe me, great. If they don't, that's ok, too! I'm cool either way. What tends to happen, though, is that people see what I do as they get to know me better and they start to open up to it a bit more. That's even more cool!
It's cooler!

I must say, I'm rather touched by all the love going on around here. I love you guys too.

*cry*

Elaine, you have totally inspired me to read the Wrinkle in Time series. Thank you for your sweet words. As always, you and Jenn have made me feel all warm and fuzzy!

 
At 9:15 PM, Blogger LynAnne said...

Isn't the internet a wonderful place? I'm so happy to read about how you are finding yourself.

On the topic of ghost story tuesday, have a photo I took in my parent's new house that I am sending you. Maybe it's not anything you have experience with but I'd like your opinion on it. I'm not brave enough to post it on my own blog.

 
At 12:12 AM, Anonymous Arachne said...

Tree, I have a (potentially dumb) question for you:

What about animals? Do they have ghosts? Do they stick around or visit as previous humans appear to?

I keep flipping back and forth on whether I believe or not. Sometimes yes, sometimes heck no. All just depends on what weirdness has happened to me recently. I'm really anjoying reading about your adventures and Jenn's.

 
At 11:51 PM, Anonymous samantha said...

Hello! I, too, found you on breed 'em and weep and am transfixed. My dad was killed by a drunk driver when I was three. I'm an only child. I am now 27 and I know he's around all the time. I just feel it. He comes to me in dreams sometimes and I can also feel a warmth on the back of my neck that I know is him. Some people think I'm crazy, others think it's 'neat' but I don't care. I hardly got to know him so I'm glad he's watching over me. I was sad on my wedding day for maybe a few minutes until I realized he WAS with me so he wasn't missing anything. He still got to see his only child, his baby girl, walk down the aisle on the arm of his brother. That gave mea peace.

Thank you for what you do. I'll be back of course!

 
At 5:39 PM, Blogger Chickadee_76 said...

Tree,
I too have the "gift" or curse,
depending on how you see it. Your post helped me tremendously. I have been getting a lot of premonitions lately, and people's reactions to them have been very mixed. I am still learning to trust my instincts as to whether I should tell someone or not. But, as you say, people will either believe or they won't. Maybe they will be mad at first, but in, time they will be thankful for the knowledge. Thank you for sharing your experiences.

 

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