Crazy-ass family

You just can't make this stuff up

Monday, March 27, 2006

Breathing Is Important

My therapist suggested I make some purchases. So, I've been reading Full Catastrophe Living and doing Mindfulness Meditation by Jon Kabat-Zinn. I've managed to fall asleep both times I've tried to make it through the entire 45 minute body scan. Ironically, I fall asleep right before I get to the part of my body that hurts the most right now. Hmmmm.
Anyway, so far, the main focus of this whole meditation business is breathing. Watching your breathing.
In.
Out.
Feel your belly rise and fall with it.
Focus on the toe on your left foot.
Breathe into your toe.
Breathe from the toe.
It, my friends, is challenging.

Yesterday, we decided to go to the Byward Market and walk around. The weather was gorgeous. As we loaded the kids and their various accoutrements into the car, our pregnant neighbor appeared. This is her third child. She already has two girls. I like my neighbor, by the way. Just so's you know.

Neighbor: Guess what? I had my ultrasound today!
Jim: Oh yeah? What's the verdict?
Neighbor: I'm having a BOY!
Tree: Wow, that's awesome!
Neighbor: I get to have both.
Tree: You're very lucky!
Neighbor: I'm one of the 20%.
Tree: Huh?
Neighbor: You don't know? Once you've had two children of the same sex, there's an 80% chance that your third will be the same sex as the first two.
Tree: (Looking toward my van full of beautiful boys). Ah. Well, that makes sense.
Neighbor: I'm in the 20%!
Her glance toward my van says, you're not!
Tree: You must be so happy! Congratulations.

We get into the car and as we back out of the driveway I observe my neighbor take a deep drag off her cigarette.

I am breathing.
I am breathing in...and out.
Inbreath...outbreath.
Inbreath...outbreath.
I am feeling my belly rise...
and fall.

12 Comments:

At 10:47 AM, Blogger kris said...

Um, I think I'll just shut up now, before I say anything at all.

 
At 10:53 AM, Blogger Jennboree said...

She did NOT smoke a cancer stick! I'd be breathing fire out of my toes if I saw a pregnant woman do that.

Guess my mother is one of the 20% too. Lucky us for having a spoiled little brother!

 
At 12:59 PM, Blogger mama_tulip said...

Hmm. I'll go with the whole, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" thing. 'Cause I don't have anything nice to say.

 
At 1:33 PM, Blogger Ann said...

I read often.. post seldom..

BUT ALL I CAN SAY TO THAT IS DEAR LORD!!!!

 
At 1:46 PM, Blogger s@bd said...

I don't mind being cruel when there's no permanent record but seeing as this blog will probably go on forever and at some point I will probably go to Quebec and by some sheer coincidence I will meet your neighbour and she will have just finished reading this very post and will realize that you were talking about her and she will be seriously pissed off. But not at me because I did not say anything mean about her. EVEN THOUGH SHE CLEARLY DESERVES IT.

 
At 2:54 PM, Blogger Odd Mix said...

You, however are in the who-cares-what-the-percentage is who has three wonderful children regardless of the XY coincidence. And you care about their health and welfare whilt she only seems to care about the percentage she is in.

BITCH! Oooops... Was that my outloud voice?

 
At 4:18 PM, Blogger LoriLaurieLauri said...

Idiot.


(And I don't mean you, Tree!)


And I basically wanted to say the same thing as the OddMan there (lol!), so...just ditto that!

 
At 10:35 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i must admit, breathing excercises have worked for me, but i have never attempted to breath into my toe. come on now lol deeep slowwww breathing works to stop my panic attacks..u just need to sit there long enough and do it long enough, till you realize your heart is slowing down..it has to eventually..
you were too nice to your neighbor..u shouldn't have taken that , i woulda jumped on top of her and started pulling out her hair..does she realize HOW BADLY we've wanted a little girl??? to add to ALL our lil boys we have? lol it's just not nice of her..
your sis

 
At 11:09 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. Some people are just unbelievable insensitive and rude.

Luckily that's not you, Tree.

Jill xo

 
At 11:45 AM, Blogger LynAnne said...

Believe it or not, there will come a time when she looks at your three boys enviously and says, "I wish I had 3 of the same gender too." You know what? I'm in that 20%. I see my two boys playing together and see the intense bond they have and wish they had a little brother.

Isn't funny how we desire what we don't have?

 
At 2:53 PM, Blogger Shana said...

Wow. I'm sure she was thrilled and all, but it sounds like she was deliberately trying to make you feel badly. How petty.

You showed more restraint than I would have.

 
At 9:11 AM, Blogger MomToTracyNSheri said...

I'm happy for your neighbor. Not because she's in the "special 20%" or whatever, but because she obviously has never experienced a miscarriage, pregnancy scare, or infertility. To be so glibly thrilled about such a little thing as a penis and to do something so ignorant like SMOKE while pg shows that she doesn't get it. At all.

Lucky her.

I guess I'm in the same 20% (have two girls and am pg with a boy) but I never got excited about the penis. Just about the heartbeat. I wish my babymaking experiences had been so carefree that I would have been so excited about a penis and not care what I do to my body while pregnant. Oh well.

 

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